92 Thoughts I Had While Rewatching ‘The Philadelphia Story’

There’s a time and a place for modern-day romantic comedies, but sometimes you need to go back to the blueprint—and that’s just what I’ve done today by rewatching George Cukor’s classic 1940 screwball comedy, The Philadelphia Story. While I can’t really picture Cukor or Katharine Hepburn coming back to life in 2025 and finding out that their Oscar-winning film is now…streaming on Tubi, that’s the world we’re living in, and I love it.

Below, find literally every thought I had while rewatching The Philadelphia Story, starring Hepburn, Cary Grant, and Jimmy Stewart.

1. God, I love it when Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer presents something!
2. I forgot how hilariously long these opening credits are.
3. Like, do we actually need to know the associate set decorator’s name before we watch the movie?
4. No shade to the associate set decorator! I wish him well!
5. Oh, right, this movie came out in 1940, so he’s…probably no longer with us. I just bummed myself out.
6. Anyway!
7. Jesus Christ, C.K. Dexter Haven (Cary Grant) pushing his ex-wife Tracy Lord (Katharine Hepburn) to the ground to the tune of a quirky score is…crazy.
8. Were people really named “Seth” in the ’40s?
9. Dinah Lord, this is your film, girlina.
10. I really do love Dinah’s tiny little masc outfit.
11. How do you spell omelet?
12. I just paused my TV for 10 minutes to practice my Katharine Hepburn accent.
13. “Art, my eye!”
14. Tracy is such a divorced icon.
15. Dinah saying “innundo” instead of “innuendo” makes me so happy.
16. Personally, I think it’s totally fine not to invite your shitty, cheating dad to your wedding, but Dinah and Mrs. Lord disagree.
17. “Oh Dinah, please, go. Go!” is some peak ’40s mothering.
18. I forgot about Uncle Willie, legendary creep.
19. No, seriously, why the fuck are you goosing your niece?
20. Tracy’s fiancé George is possibly the only one in this movie who doesn’t talk with a weird little transatlantic accent (because he used to be a coal miner, you see!).
21. Tracy really does wear the pants in this marriage-to-be, and that’s not just a reference to Hepburn’s fondness for slacks.
22. Oh, Liz Imbrie, you proto-Liz Lemon sardonic icon.
23. Jimmy Stewart is such a dick in this movie, but in such a hot way.
24. I absolutely love Liz’s little hat.
25. I’m so pissed off that I missed the era of journalism when it was normal to smoke in the office.
26. And just like that, the “Philadelphia story” is assigned to Connor (Stewart) and Liz (Ruth Hussey); their mission is to write up Tracy’s wedding to George, which does sound very much like a Vogue wedding.
27. “I understand we understand each other.” “Quite.” Has there ever been a more Cukor exchange?
28. Okay, Connor and Liz are being helped out by C.K. Dexter Haven (yes, I will be using his full name throughout), who wants to get even with his ex by ruining her wedding. Fair enough!
29. I’m with Connor and Liz; why do these insanely rich people live in a house so crowded with random stuff that, to quote Connor, it “looks like they run a hock shop on the side”?
30. Connor crank-calling Mrs. Lord to say “This is the voice of doom calling” will never not make me LOL.
31. I’m more of a Connor girl, but it cannot be denied that C.K. Dexter Haven is fine in this film, in a WASP-y, lockjaw way.
32. All that said, it’s Liz Imbrie for me all the way, at the end of the day.
33. Ah, the word “queer” used to mean “weird.” You don’t hear that so much anymore.
34. Were people really named “Junius” back then?
35. Tracy sees right through C.K. Dexter Haven, but he blackmails her into letting Connor and Liz cover the wedding so that they don’t instead run a gossip item about her dad’s affair with some dancer named Tina Mara. Ugh! Media!
36. Girl, you’re lucky you didn’t share a space-time continuum with Perez Hilton.
37. LOL at Tracy making fun of the reporters’ “horrible, snide, corkscrew English.”
38. “And would I trade places with Tracy Samantha Lord for all her wealth and beauty? Boy, just ask me.” Love you, Liz!
39. Dinah pretending to be French and fancy and forcing the interlopers to watch her play piano is so iconic.
40. “My real name is Diana but my sister changed it.” Likely thing for Tracy to do!
41. Tracy’s checkered skirt is so chic.
42. God, I love Tracy for absolutely reading these reporters right to their faces.
43. “One book isn’t much for a man of 30.” Okay, ow!
44. “South Bend. It sounds like dancing, doesn’t it?” Classist, yet funny.
45. Wow, Tracy got Liz to admit she used to be married, which Connor doesn’t even know!
46. “You’re the darndest girl, Liz.” “I think I’m sweet.” Modern-day rom-com screenwriters want this movie’s nachos!
47. And Tracy gets Connor and Liz to admit they’re sort of hooking up? Or engaging in whatever the ’40s equivalent of a situationship was?
48. I forgot about this whole caper where they pretend Uncle Willie is the cheating dad.
49. Too much going on! Pare it back to just romantic intrigue, Cukor!
50. Yes, I did just give George Cukor posthumous script notes.
51. C.K. Dexter Haven sitting on a fountain and saying “Hello, friends and enemies” is so…slutty.
52. Oop, Daddy Seth is home, and now he has to pretend to be Uncle Willie.
53. Connor to Tracy when he comes across her reading his book in the library: “You know what happens to girls like you when they read books like mine? They begin to think, and that’s bad.” God, shut up! I hate sad, young literary men so much.
54. I am standing up and screaming and fist-pumping at Tracy’s little tassel-bedecked reading cap.
55. Ugh, of course Connor is screwing over Liz (while she innocently gets a manicure!) in his pursuit of Tracy.
56. Not Connor mansplaining capitalism to Tracy! Then again, she really seems to need the help.
57. Speaking of capitalism, I want that pool.
58. Tracy’s so smitten with Connor that she already wants to give him a house to write in? How do I make my way into her inner circle?
59. How do I make my ringtone Katharine Hepburn saying “Goody”?
60. Connor describing his alcoholism as “my deep and gorgeous thirst” rocks.
61. “Strength is her religion, Mr. Connor. She finds human imperfection unforgivable.” What I wouldn’t give for this kind of characterization in modern-day female characters!
62. Cary Grant giggling is, again, wonderfully slutty.
63. “To hardly know him is to know him well” re: George is soooooooooo mean. I love it!
64. “You’ll never be a first-class human being or a first-class woman until you’ve learned to have some regard for human frailty.” Should I get this entire quote as a tramp stamp?
65. “I don’t want to be worshiped, I want to be loved.” Another tramp-stamp candidate!
66. God, I hate Tracy’s dad’s little mustache.
67. Not this evil man blaming Tracy for his infidelity!
68. “A devoted young girl gives a man the illusion that youth is still his.” Baaaaaaaaarf.
69. Uncle Willie needs to get #MeToo-ed stat.
70. “I can tell there’s something in the air because I’m being taken away.” Slay, Dinah!
71. Tracy chugging cocktails one after another is an enormous mood.
72. “C.K. Dexter Haven! Oh, C.K. Dexter Haaaaaaven!” Marry me, Drunk Connor.
73. Actually, don’t, since you already have two girlfriends.
74. He does look nice while drunkenly ranting and hiccuping in a bow tie, though.
75. Pitch: What if C.K. Dexter Haven and Connor hooked up?
76. “The world’s his oyster with an R in every month.” Good line!
77. Katharine Hepburn saying “snob” is, perhaps, the hottest scene in this entire movie.
78. “The time to make up your mind about people is never.” Running out of space on my body for all my theoretical The Philadelphia Story quote tattoos!
79. Tracy is sooooooo sprung on Connor now that he’s drunkenly contradicted the popular conception of her as a vestal virgin or whatever.
80. Man, you better get your ass back to Liz!
81. “Put me in your pocket, Mike.” Again, hot!
82. Punch!!!!!!!!!!!
83. Aw, I love Dinah’s tiny bonnet.
84. I want a gif of Tracy coming outside hungover and hunching up and away from the sun stat, because it is literally me every single weekend.
85. Yes, I am 31 and still hungover every weekend. We exist!
86. Tracy’s filmy little morning coat, or whatever it is, is also iconic. Why can’t I ever find this kind of vintage item in my size?
87. Oh yeah, fatphobia.
88. Man, they pack a lot of action into the last 20 minutes of this movie!
89. George is outta here, so Connor steps up to marry Tracy, but it’s C.K. Dexter Haven she actually wants (and marries).
90. Liz telling Connor, “Don’t get too conventional all at once, will you? There’ll be a reaction” breaks my heart. I want better for her than Tracy’s leftovers!
91. Two marriages to each other in two years? C.K. Dexter Haven and Tracy Lord really were the J.Lo and Ben of their time.
92. Does that make The Philadelphia Story…akin to Gigli?