Around the time of my 50th birthday celebration, strange things started occurring with my body. First, I skipped a period and wondered if I would break the Guinness World Record for being the oldest pregnant woman on the planet. I also noticed that I’d been sweating a lot lately, especially during the nights when I’d wake to bedsheets sticking to me like wet spinach leaves.
Then, my husband claimed I was more irritable than usual – and even the typical eye-rolls from my teens were enough to send me into an angry tailspin.
Something was brewing inside me, ready to erupt like Mount Vesuvius, but I had no clue what was wrong. It wasn’t until I experienced the first hot flash that it hit me: Was this the Big M?
I was preparing dinner one night for guests when I suddenly felt as hot as a rotisserie chicken roasting over a fire. Sweat poured in rivulets down my face, my mascara melting into black rings around my eyes. I asked my husband if the thermostat was broken, but he assured me he’d already turned it down to subzero temperatures.
So while our dinner guests were shivering around the dinner table and inquiring about sweaters, I was wiping the sweat from my brow. That’s when it occurred to me that I was sailing into the uncharted waters of menopause without a buoy in sight.
Once I realized what was happening to my body – and accepted its inevitability – it was easier to embrace my journey. I chose to look at the positive side of menopause rather than drown in the quagmire of complaints I’d heard from other women.
There were so many things to be grateful for during menopause once I was willing to change my perspective. First and foremost, NO MORE PERIODS! I didn’t have to worry about unexpected spotting while wearing white slacks or spending the money to stock up on feminine hygiene products. No more cramping, bloating, bleeding, headaches, or painful ovulation.
The end of menstruation, once I was officially in menopause, also meant that I was no longer fertile (and relieved that I wasn’t in danger of raising an infant in my fifties). Even better, I could have spontaneous sex anywhere, anytime, much to my husband’s delight. However, no one warned me about low libido during menopause or the fact that my lady parts would become as dry as Death Valley. Fortunately, there are plenty of medications to boost desire and dozens of lubricants to take care of the desert tumbleweeds for more enjoyable sex.
One of the biggest complaints about menopause is the rapid mood swings triggered by hormonal changes. However, if you dealt with PMS as I did during my 40+ years of menstruation, you should take comfort in knowing that the emotional rollercoaster you’ve been on is finally coming to a close.
Once menopause ended, my uncomfortable mood swings decreased, and I started feeling like my old self again – but as an even better, carefree version.
Weight gain is a symptom of menopause that can be psychologically problematic for women like me who have struggled to keep the numbers down on the scale. However, what I realized from my experience was the massive amount of time I’d wasted trying to have the “perfect body,” rather than concentrating on the marvels of my health.
Sure, I put on a few pounds during menopause, but my body was no longer in a race to be skinny because I finally allowed myself some grace regarding the scales. In fact, I stopped weighing myself altogether and concentrated on comfortable yet flattering clothing for my figure. This new body acceptance gave me the self-confidence I had been lacking for so long.
A clearer brain (eventually)
Brain fog is another symptom of menopause that usually starts when estrogen levels take a nosedive. Many women feel they may be developing early dementia or Alzheimer’s as a result, but there’s some good news about your forgetfulness.
I discovered there were several things I could do to combat brain fog, such as: eating a balanced diet, drinking more water, regularly exercising, getting plenty of rest, and taking supplements like ginkgo biloba and soya isoflavone. Before you take any supplements, of course, talk to your doctor for their insights.
Insomnia and fatigue go hand in hand with menopause. Much of the irritability is due to a lack of rest, which is hard to get when dealing with insomnia. My doctor recommended melatonin as a natural sleep aid, but I took advantage of those extra hours of wakefulness to catch up on reading or binge-watching my favorite shows.
Plus, no one judged me if I took a nap in the middle of the day – which felt completely decadent after years of working long hours and shuttling the kids to after-school activities. So consider menopause the perfect excuse to pamper yourself and take some much-needed “me time.”
If you’re willing to ditch the negative perspectives of menopause and focus on the positives, you’ll find that this natural phase of life equates to freedom. This reframe will make it easier to focus on yourself and your goals and promote a higher level of self-confidence. Furthermore, once you experience this taste of freedom, you’ll wonder why you ever dreaded the change of life – because, in many ways, it’s the beginning of a whole new (and wonderful) life!