I Kind of Want What Mommy—as in, the 97-Year-Old Tortoise Who Just Gave Birth at the Philadelphia Zoo—Has

I know this column technically exists to celebrate the joys of Hollywood romance and friendship, but there’s a new protagonist to root for this spring, and she’s straight out of Philadelphia. Her name is Mommy, and she’s a critically endangered Galapagos tortoise who just became a first-time mother to four sweet little hatchlings at the tender age of 97. There’s a father in the picture too—his name is Abrazzo, which I believe is the Spanish word for “hug,” and he’s the Philadelphia Zoo’s other oldest inhabitant, making this the antithesis of an age-gap relationship—but as a currently childfree adult who’s fairly set on having kids late (if at all), I’m choosing to focus solely on Mommy in this moment of her record-breaking matrescence.

Not only is Mommy the oldest first-time mom in her species’s known history, but she’s also a legendary queen in her own right. She’s been deemed “one of the most genetically valuable Galapagos tortoises in the Association of Zoos and Aquariums’ species survival plan,” per the Philadelphia Zoo, with its president and CEO, Jo-Elle Mogerman, adding that “Mommy arrived at the Zoo in 1932, meaning anyone that has visited the Zoo for the last 92 years has likely seen her. Philadelphia Zoo’s vision is that those hatchlings will be a part of a thriving population of Galapagos tortoises on our healthy planet 100 years from now.”